North Korea Just Accidentally The Whole Island of Yeonpyeong! Wat do?

Something important has occurred, and I'm gonna rant about it! Wanna hear it, here it goes...

As many of you may already know, North Korea just accidentally the whole island of Yeonpyeong, South Korea. In case some of you have been slacking off on your history homework, let me assure you that this a pretty big deal (like me, ZING).

Quick history lesson!

N. Korea and S. Korea used to be one nation, but then Korea suffered a severe case of acute schizophrenia which was, The Korean War. At the end of the war the two sides of Korea decided to draw a big-ass fucking line right down the middle of them and declared it demilitarized (even though they both have huge fucking armies on both sides basically ready to bum-rush across the border and fuck shit up at a moments notice). Since then, 1953, the two sides have basically been having a really intense staring contest.

This would be all fine and dandy if it were really just about N. Korea and S. Korea. The fact is, this battle is being fought by two small powers, but they have puppet masters. In the Korean War of the 50's it was communism versus capitalism, the USSR versus America. Today, it's China versus America, seeing as the USSR disbanded and left Russia a bankrupt fucking pit (good job guys).

In case you're really out of the loop. Let me tell you that China and America are not on the friendliest of terms. In fact I'm almost positive that the only reason we tolerate each other is because we know we can't live without the other. China and the US are those two teenage girls who love to talk and hang out but behind each others back, can't STAND each other. Yeah, China and the US are teenage girls... good metaphor Howie.

Anyways.

Now that we have all that back-story cleared up and in view, let's jump to the current news!

North Korea just accidentally the whole island of Yeonpyeong! Sometime around 2PM on Monday N. Korean artillery opened fire on the S. Korean island. They launched "dozens (of millions)" of rounds and S. Korea immediately retaliated by scrambling F-16 fighter jets and returning fire with "over 80(thousand)" rounds of artillery fire.

The whole island was evacuated and so far it seems like nearly two (hundred) S. Korean soldiers died with many more injured, alongside numerous civilian injuries. Pictures showed the island ablaze with plumes of smoke rising from homes.

Officials are saying this is the biggest tantrum N. Korea has thrown since the war ended back in '53. S. Korean officials out of Seoul are warning the nation-child that is N. Korea that another sucker punch like this and they will suffer "enormous retaliation," Likely in the form of all-American weaponry.

Of course, according to N. Korea, it's not a sucker punch at all. Apparently, the S. Korean navy was participating in a live fire drill in the area. N. Korean officials had warned the southerners about firing in the disputed waters. That being said, the S. Korean ships were never in N. Korean waters and fired away from land. This after officially assuring the North that it was a drill, and they would not be harmed in any way.

North Korea decided to open fire on a civilian island anyways.

What I find totally hilarious is the reaction by the rest of the world. South Korea, although outraged, is showing a ridiculous amount of restraint. Like a parent at the grocery store, trying to stay calm, but firm, right after their little tyrant in the cart knocked over three jars of tomato sauce. I have read many quotes by officials stating that this is literally just North Korea throwing a little temper tantrum to get attention.

Perhaps the best way to fight these fuckers is to just ignore them.

I stand by my words when I say that North Korea itself is NO THREAT to the United States. Have you seen what America has done to organized military in the past 20 years? Of course you haven't because no-one cares, because it's not fucking interesting. You wanna know why it's not interesting? It's because the United States literally decimates its enemies on the battlefield. The only place where we fail is when the population fights back, or when the enemy engages in guerrilla warfare.

The United States has enough military cojones to slap the shit out of N. Korea in a month, I don't give a fuck if they have the worlds second largest standing army, we're 30+ years ahead of them in technology. We can rain flaming fucking hell from the skies, without EVER being seen or heard. We can rain flaming fucking hell from the skies from hundreds of miles away. To be honest, I'm almost positive we could do that from here in the United States.

The only thing standing between us and spanking North Korea into fetal submission, is China!

China is the real threat, and every time North Korea slaps it's southern brother it runs back underneath China for protection.

I hope N. Korea decides to continue and attack S. Korea for retarded-ass reasons. I hope they prove without a shadow of a doubt that they are in the wrong, and I hope they get cocky enough to try and pick a real fight. I hope the whole world says, "Wow, you're being a dick." and turns it's back on N. Korea. I hope that China has to decide to either defend the blatantly wrong or turn the cold shoulder in order to protect it's own economic interests.

I really want to see this happen, because I'm fucking tired of hearing about Kim Jong Il and his stupid bullshit.

Go South Korea! Go America! Go Sanity!